8 Things That Will Irritate a Marylander
1. The Beltway
695, why do you do this? We just want to get home! If you take the Baltimore Beltway twice a day, five days a week, you deserve the Congressional Medal of Honor, at the very least.
2. Outsiders who can't say our cities/counties
Elly-cott City? Buddy, are you looking for Ellicott City? Same goes for Wiki-meeko and War-sister counties, or my inexplicable favorite, Town-son. We don't have those places here. It's hard for us to look at those words as an outsider and realize that they're actually kind of tricky, and we'll continue to be judgmental.
3. The sudden departure of the Baltimore Colts
We absolutely cannot let this one go. Proud as we are of the Ravens and their achievements, I have seen adults break down like tired, cranky toddlers over the Colts. These wounds will never heal.
Us when we think about the Colts. via ragexlove.tumblr.com
4. The north/south debate
The rest of the country seems to have decided that the north starts in Pennsylvania and the south starts in Virginia, leaving Maryland in the no-man's-land in between. Northerners say we're south, southerners say we're north. And they always say it dismissively ("You wouldn't get it, you're from the south/north"). Excuse you. We're perfect, that's what we are.
5. The OTHER Ocean City
We do not have time for anyone else's Ocean City. If your Ocean City doesn't have Maryland crabs or the liquor store with the dancing beer cans, we're not interested. Sorry, New Jersey, but you can take your bragging elsewhere.
Seen: Paradise. via Eva Niessner
6. The weather
Pop quiz--if I wore a raincoat on Monday, a sweater on Tuesday, and flip-flops on Wednesday, what season is it in Maryland? Trick question--it could be ANY season here. A Marylander's wardrobe is ready for a sudden sharp turn on a daily basis, because there's no telling what the weather will do here.
7. People not understanding we don't know everyone here
I know we're one of the smallest states, but we cannot possibly know every other resident of Maryland. "Oh, you're from Maryland? Do you know my cousin Jill? She lives in Baltimore!" So do 622,000 other people, my friend. We're social butterflies here, but no one is THAT social.
8. When you run out of Old Bay
Self-explanitory. Commence the tears.
Despite these very serious annoyances, it's all worth it to get to live in the greatest state in the Union--and don't worry, we feel your pain!
This post was written by Route One Apparel blogger, Eva Niessner.